A-bunting we won’t go…

Having returned somewhat fuzzily from a wedding do on Saturday night (in Bristol), we made a little bit of progress – both along the canals and through our hangovers – on Sunday, ending up at Pewsey. Today, we pootled along to Bedwyn – and had to go down a flight of 11 or so locks. Having spent Friday going up Caen Hill and therefore up a pretty big hill, it feels almost like being cheated out of your altitude, having to come down all these locks again. Fortunately, we shared the lock-load with a nice couple on their holiday-home-boat – they’re a lot easier with two pairs of arms to wield the windlasses and push the gates.

I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but there’s a bit of an infestation of bunting at the moment – Union Jack bunting, to be precise. It’s even made it across the canals and on to boats, like some invasive plant species they warn you about on the news. Although I’ll lay a penny to a pound that retiree and holiday boats are more susceptible to the epidemic than most liveaboards. Suffice to say we shall not be joining in the bunting infestation, or the Union Jack waving, or – worse still – the printed-out pictures of Her or any Royals in Reenie’s windows. Weird. The only quite amusing instance of flaggery was a washing line with assorted undergarments with the Union Jack upon them – including some large bloomers. Perhaps it sums up how I feel about the whole thing a little more.

We went for a walk to get a quiet pint earlier, but the one of two pubs in Bedwyn that was open was already in full Royalist party swing. It seems they’re a big fan of HRH in Wiltshire. There was a covers band banging out soft rock numbers, while very many flush-faced middle aged people rocked back and forth, with that giddy smile of those who don’t get out very much. Not really something you can join in with later on, or if you really really hate all this Jubilee nonsense.

So we’re back aboard, and I’m writing this with a fire going – in June. It’s really not very balmy and summery this evening. Tomorrow, onwards to glamorous Hungerford and perhaps Newbury. Maybe the epidemic-infestation of bunting and flags will start to subside after the long weekend is over (but I shan’t be back in the office!)…

Thanks for the culvert, Ma’am

I’ll be blogging under the tag ‘Reenie’s Progress’ for our imminent journey to The North – Leeds, to be precise. It’s going to be a slow adventure: you can get there in about three-and-a-half hours by train, but it’s going to take us around six weeks. That’s how defunct we consider the rail network. Better late than never.

On our way, I’ll be writing daily about our Inland Odyssey – as I’ve dubbed it – and the trials therein. It’s not going to take as long as Odysseus’ journey and I anticipate the Sirens to be in the form of appealing canal-side ales (luring us with their hoppy, boozey voices) and any whirlpools will be replaced by slightly-dodgy Industrial Revolution locks.

It looks like we’ll finally be able to leave to head to Yorkshire – although perhaps in stages – later this week. We’d planned to leave just over two weeks ago, but as a culvert – the big pipe underneath the canal – was apparently in a bad way just past Trowbridge, we’ve been waiting for it to be fixed. While it might be easy to blame Trowbridge for its weak culvert, it wouldn’t really be fair – the canals are really very old, so a bit of maintenance (albeit at a very inconvenient time for us) is inevitable. Had it not been fixed, apparently a whole stretch of canal about nine miles long could have drained. And, after all, a canal without water is merely a trench – and is certainly no good for boats…

While I’m no Royalist, apparently British Waterways (the not-so-shadowy entity which presides over our nation’s many miles of canal, etc) have had to step up their repairs in time for the Jubilee this weekend. At this moment, men in high-vis vests travail alongside various diggers, cranes and construction paraphernalia, watched over by HRH’s hench-birds – the swans – to ensure they get the work done in time for her big do.

So thanks for the culvert, Ma’am – although the prospect of flotillas of inebriated weekend boaters in full Union Jack regalia doesn’t fill me with glee. Ah well – we’ll actually be able to get going, which is the main thing.

I’ve been meaning to do some exposition for our current boating situation – the acquisition of Reenie and our move on to the canals – so I’ll post this and then get going on the Story So Far. Rest assured, there is Mild Peril (like on the film posters), Strong Language, and Scences of Violence (not to people, though – don’t worry). I’ll try to recount it accurately and with all the drama we’ve experienced becoming boaters.

Possibly even more.